The only thing that is constant, is change and the quickest way to make that happen is to stop letting fear to control your life. And yet here you are afraid of it like it’s some kind of horror movie. Take a look at your life and you will see that nothing stayed the same. Change happens in small or big leaps and you may not be able to see the subtle changes, that doesn’t mean they don’t exist.
Any change, positive or negative, is going to create an element of fear such as starting a new relationship or losing your job.
Would you be surprised if I tell you that there a benefit to your fear? And that it doesn’t have to be as scary as you make it out to be?
But first let’s look at the reasons behind you fear, when you get some insight on this, you will be able to take action anyway.
You, including me, are afraid of the unknown because you don’t know what’s on the other side and it can give you the case of anxiety. Your mind tells you that it isn’t safe and encourages you to avoid to take action or even make a decision. You haven’t experienced this before so you don’t really know the outcome.
I don’t necessarily believe in the wrong choice but you make the best decision in every given moment with the information that you have. Your intuition can guide you a lot better than your mind will because of your mind as powerful as it is, has the ability to cloud your vision. Here is what I encourage you to do, let go of perfectionism and the absolutes.
Perfectionism is an illusion and doesn’t exist and absolutes can just about anytime set you up to fail because you are so hung up at the “it is this or nothing”. Perfectionism also allows fear to control your life because you don’t create the wiggle room for growth.
Which then leads to an increase of self-doubt. But for just one moment, reflect on your life and see where you’ve had to make adjustments in the past and how you made it happen. Use this to move forward.
And yet, by facing the unknown and embracing the change you are about to face, you learn so much about yourself and that you are capable off and inevitable learn some new skills. Its timing may never be ideal but it gives you space to examine and evaluate your core values and take a look if everything is still aligned with who you are.
Self-discovery helps you walk your path of authenticity and therefore lead to progress as you are expanding your comfort zone. You are more resilient than you give yourself credit for and you have what it takes to control your life and take charge of how you allow to be impacted.
Anytime I share about the struggle we endured when my son was fighting for his life, I hear from other mom’s how they didn’t think they could handle it or deal with it. But when you are not given a choice, you are going to show up the best way you know how, and you will face whatever comes your way. Sometimes gracefully and sometimes not so much.
And that doesn’t mean you won’t face worry and anxiety along the way but by reframing the negative stories you tell yourself, and focus on the positive outcome that your forward moving action could lead to, it will feel better overall.
Now I am not going to encourage you to push your feelings aside because I don’t believe in that. I think we need to feel our feelings, how else are you ever going to grow and move forward and will ultimately make the changes in your life?
Your feelings are good indicators for you and your path and when you can name them, you are standing in your power and maintain your own control.
And again, something that may be helpful is to create a list and acknowledge the changes you have made in your life, what you have learned and remind yourself that you have made it through some tough times already.
Your life, your journey, is about putting one foot in front of the other. It’s about trusting your intuition and develop positive mindset strategies. And yes, there are going to be shit days but they aren’t all going to be like that!
Conquering your fear means rebelling against the stories you’ve been telling yourself and declare what you want to be do and have and then take moments throughout the day to make them happen. And I am here to help!
We all need a little help sometimes in calling out our excuses, in guiding us with a strategy and in cheering us on to making it happen.