And we are talking about vulnerability. I have a few friends in my circle who do this being open and asking for help with such grace that I couldn’t imagine them not reaching out and sharing when they have a shit day.
For me that’s a pretty foreign concept – or at least it has been. I can in some instances be vulnerable with the right people but that took a lot of work to get there. It wasn’t easy for me to share when I struggle with the words to share on how I am feeling or what I am experiencing.
But I also know how good it feels to share something so scary with someone – the kind of thing you are afraid to admit to yourself but there’s something also quite beautiful for when someone is able to hold space for you and you can share from a place of love and trust.
I believe that the journey of vulnerability is quite personal and you won’t find me sharing anything in the middle of a shit-storm because I have to have time to decompress, to detach, to analyze and find my peace within the storm.
I’m a huge fan and advocate of journaling for that reason. I can write angrily. I can write in the midst of frustration. And then step away and come back when I had some time to collect my emotions a but.
But to share when I have hit a wall about something I used to only wish for – I now have this but that also doesn’t mean I do this effectively. but I have time and space to share at a later date.
I also learned to appreciate my partner – who by the look upon my face knows… I mean just knows when something is going on. And while in the past I was blasted with “what’s wrong” and “what can I do” and “what did I do” and so many other things, it’s through my own acknowledgement of necessary healing we are at a place of where he knows to give me space to come to him. And I’ve found myself reaching out saying I don’t have the bandwidth to cope and deal with the situation at the moment.
So I hope that you are open to exploring your relationship with vulnerability and get the new issue for My Rebel Year!