Every time there’s a decision to create change, it seems the road to the desired outcome is riddled with potholes and roadblocks.

It’s you being tested to see how bad you really want the desired change to actually happen or if you are just going to give up and quit.

The thing about change is that it won’t actually happen until you say “enough is enough” because it’s in that moment you’ve actually achieved emotional rock bottom.

Emotional rock bottom isn’t like the rock bottom we’ve come to know – the $0.02 in your bank account or being homeless – no emotional rock bottom is that point when you can’t go on being the person you’ve been. Or rather it’s the moment you’re ready to be who you are that’s merely been hiding from the world.

In my lifetime, I have had a few of those moments that ended up me leaving my marriage, moving to a new city, and even rocking the boat in other relationships.

The thing that happens is that people are going to say a few things as if a change is something unheard of. When I started to set boundaries about what I would or wouldn’t tolerate any more I heard a lot of “but you used to”. Well yes, I used to but I don’t anymore.

It’s not easy to maneuver change no matter how small or big it feels. And sometimes the smallest change creates the biggest ripple in life. I’ve had people who claimed to be my best friend, choosing to no longer be my friend because … well for so many reasons – the biggest one perhaps being that I don’t tolerate bullshit very well and that playing the victim isn’t my forte anymore.

The difficult roads, however, will lead to amazing destinations to the freedom of being you, and that means letting go of friendships. It’s simply acknowledging that you are no longer available for that doesn’t bring your joy, peace, and happiness in some kind of a way.

Whatever change you are wanting to create, turn this into a goal by being specific of what you want.

Then take a moment to brainstorm some things that need to happen like setting boundaries.

Write out what that looks like i.e. saying no more often.

What’s the payoff by saying no more often? What does that mean? What does that look and feel like?

Go deep with the reflection – and if you need a gentle reminder to help you, there’s a poster for that!

Petra Monaco

Petra Monaco

The Rebels Den

Petra Monaco is a published author, coach, mom and breaks the status quo for fun. As a foster kid, she knows the challenges and excuses people make as she rewrote her own story and then worked her way through to become a Master's level therapist. However, after watching her son fight for his life due to a rare genetic disorder and three liver transplants, she now coaches creatives and multi-passionates to stop waiting for “one day” and the “perfect moments’. Petra helps you dive deeply into the heart of things in order to discover your next steps, inspires you to set up your own personal framework so you can break free from fear, doubt, and overwhelm so you can start creating the life you want now. Petra uses her personal story to inspire and motivate people into doing the work they need to do to create change because she believes that your excuses are just avoidance. You can have the cake and eat it too if you're willing to show up for it!
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