Why the ‘shoulds’ hinder your life

How many times have your parents, teachers, friends, bosses, colleagues and society told you, “you should do this or you should do that?”

The word should can feel incredibly heavy.

Seriously, it’s hard to know what you want when you are “shoulding” all over yourself.

I can think back and remember my social worker telling me I “shouldn’t hang out with this person or that person.

And my foster parents that told me I should get an A because of my future career depended on it.

Or maybe you shouldn’t curse because it’s unprofessional or it makes you stand in a dark light.

Or you shouldn’t get a tattoo or piercing.

And let me tell you, it’s all a freaking set up.

It set’s you up for a life that isn’t yours to live. In fact, it creates a life on someone else’s terms. It seriously interferes with the heart of the matter:

Doing what you want by doing what you love!

For example, parents have told you that you should have good grades, so you can go to college, earning a degree chosen by your parents.

Or maybe your gym coach told you, that you should practice 5 days out of the week if you wanted to become a competitor. Now don’t get me wrong, becoming the best at something takes dedication and hard work and yes even practicing 5 days a week.

But if it’s a should and not something you want to do, it feels heavy.

A friend of mine is a writer and she believed that she “should’ be a coach. She believed that is what she had to do to reach her destination: To be a writer.

Should, just like doubt, kills dreams!

This is the kind of stuff that happens when you listen to other people and not your intuition.

Because of other people “shoulding” all over you, you will talk yourself out of it.

And it feels heavy because it doesn’t excite you or inspire you to show up.

The moment you let go of all the shoulds you will experience a sense of relief, a sense of freedom if you will. You will feel lighter because you are now willing to follow your intuition and your heart!

About the author

Petra Monaco is an artist, author, and professional problem solver for creatives, rebels, and multi-passionates.

She is here to help you remove frustration from your life and achieve your creative dreams with more ease and confidence.

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